Prioritizing our energy
Prioritizing where to direct your energy
(Billi’s thoughts)
Let’s face it, the world is pretty fucked right now. From war, to mother nature testing us all, and everything in between. If you allow yourself to dive deep it can get very emotionally overwhelming.
I was talking to a friend about this the other day. They listed off a bunch of things going on in their life and then added all the world’s issues on top of that. It was a lot for even the most supported, happiest, financially secure human to handle let alone someone who doesn’t have any of those things.
It got me thinking. How do I handle not going down the rabbit hole? It feels like, “well we are all fucked aren’t we?”
A term came to mind, it’s informed naivety. It means, “I am well aware of everything happening on this earth, but I am also well aware that I don’t have the emotional space to put too much into hoping something will change where I have no control over changing it”.
This is the same reason I don’t do the news or politics. My heart lies in four different counties that I am very connected to.
Deciding to share my love of their nature and people rather than their messed up issues, has become crucial for me.
I also try my best not to allow myself to get too attached to anyone’s drama.
I am building my boundaries around what I know I can deal with. I am taking the time to really work out what is worth my time.
Now don’t get me wrong. Sometimes I do have my heart tugged at and I follow something that makes me mad, or I put my love into helping a friend out.
But most of the time I am trying to stay in my own lane and give to those things that give back to me in the best ways.
That might seem selfish, and I do hugely admire those who are out there fighting for the cause. Unfortunately, I am not one of them. I’ve learnt this through trial and error around my boundaries.
I think when it comes to dealing with where to put your energy, learning your boundaries is very important.
“5 Top Tips to Build your Resilience”
-By Normal Murray
(Edited / shortened for our reading. Check out the full article below)
Mental strength means that you regulate your emotions, manage your thoughts, and behave in a positive manner, despite your circumstances. Developing mental strength is about finding the courage to live according to your values and being bold enough to create your own definition of success.
Mental strength involves more than just willpower; it requires hard work and commitment. It’s about establishing healthy habits and choosing to devote your time and energy to self-improvement of your Emotional Intelligence.
Although it’s easier to feel mentally strong when life seems simple -- often, true mental strength becomes most apparent in the midst of tragedy. Choosing to develop skills that increase your mental strength is the best way to prepare for life’s inevitable obstacles.
Many exercises exist that can help you develop mental strength. But here are five that can get you started:
1. Evaluate Your Core Beliefs
We’ve all developed core beliefs about ourselves, our lives and the world in general. Core beliefs develop over time and largely depend upon our past experiences. Whether you’re aware of your core beliefs or not, they influence your thoughts, your behavior and emotions.
Sometimes, core beliefs are inaccurate and unproductive. For example, if you believe that you’ll never succeed in life, you may be less apt to apply for new jobs -- and inadvertently, you may not present yourself well on job interviews. Therefore, your core beliefs may become a self-fulfilling prophecy.
2. Expend Your Mental Energy Wisely
Wasting brain power ruminating about things you can’t control drains mental energy quickly. The more you think about negative problems that you can’t solve, the less energy you’ll have leftover for creative endeavors. For example, sitting and worrying about the weather forecast isn’t helpful. If a major storm is headed your way, worrying about it won’t prevent it. You can, however, choose to prepare for it. Focus on what is only within your control.
Save your mental energy for productive tasks, such as solving problems or setting goals.When your thoughts aren’t productive, make a conscious effort to shift your mental energy to more helpful topics.
3. Replace Negative Thoughts with Productive Thoughts
Although most of us don’t spend time thinking about our thoughts, increasing your awareness of your thinking habits proves useful in building resilience. Exaggerated, negative thoughts, such as, “I can’t ever do anything right,” hold you back from reaching your full potential. Catch your negative thoughts before they spiral out of control and influence your behavior.
Identify and replace overly negative thoughts with thoughts that are more productive. Productive thoughts don’t need to be extremely positive, but should be realistic. A more balanced thought may be, “I have some weaknesses, but I also have plenty of strengths.”
4. Practice Tolerating Discomfort
Mental strength is about accepting your feelings without being controlled by them.
Mental strength also involves an understanding of when it makes sense to behave contrary to your emotions. For example, if you experience anxiety that prevents you from trying new things or accepting new opportunities, try stepping out of your comfort zone if you want to continue to challenge yourself. Tolerating uncomfortable emotions takes practice, but it becomes easier as your confidence grows.
Practice behaving like the person you’d like to become. Instead of saying, “I wish I could be more outgoing,” choose to behave in a more outgoing manner, whether you feel like it or not. Some discomfort is often necessary for greater gain, and tolerating that discomfort will help make your vision a reality, one small step at a time.
5. Reflect on Your Progress Daily
Today’s busy world doesn’t lend itself to making much time available for quiet reflection. Create time to reflect upon your progress toward developing mental strength. At the end of each day, ask yourself what you’ve learned about your thoughts, emotions and behavior. Consider what you hope to improve upon or accomplish tomorrow.
Developing mental strength is a work in progress. There is always room for improvement, and at times this will seem more difficult than at other times. Reflecting upon your progress can reinforce your ability to reach your definition of success while living according to your values.
Thought/ Journal Topics:
Where are you putting most of your energy ?
What things feel like they are sucking your energy rather than building it up?
What are some worldly issues that you really resonate with and why?
What are your top 5 priorities you feel you should be putting your energy into?
What is overwhelming you lately ?
How could you better plan your time so you can work on the things that are in your control ?
